sinking

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads



this strange wave of despair.
if you can see this, scream on my tagboard.
don't know what the hell to do when someone tells you he's interested in you.
when I've come all the way prepared to stay like I am, having nothing to offer but friendship.
I just don't feel alright, and I don't feel like having it hanging over my head ..
but it does.

sigh


and I also know people are talking and talking but I try to be cool about it, because it is not them who matter but the suffocating feeling makes my insides boil.
are you saying and doing these thing because I am one of the few who you can really talk to, be a friend? why must it try to be something more? why can't anything stay like the way it is?
I'm really tired keeping up with myself
and I don't think I have anything much to offer as a person
you are the one who's more senior, more experienced
I will always feel indebted, on the receiving end
and I ask my heart what my heart thinks
and I feel sad :(
because I don't believe there's anyone for me
and I am not for anybody




dancing on a high, dark shadows playing across faces
always tired eyes hidden away
what I search for is still far away
persistance
confusion
and I am still lost



what goes on with my life?
school, recently exams, and people.
oh my goodness I miss my closest friends.
listening to band music brings back this inner peace, but does not quell the waves of nostalgia and longing to b e back home. if only I could listen to the sound of silence, let it deafen me and believe that ignorance is bliss.



Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
To show me a garden that's bursting into life


-*